Coping

Hey everybody, sorry I didn't post last week- I was juggling a lot of stuff and the blog fell through the cracks- but i'm back and this week in class we were talking about coping, and that is something that really struck a chord with me as it is something I find myself doing quite often.

Now I am just going to talk about coping as a whole, but definitely apply this definition to any situation in your life were you see you need it- and I hope it will help you find some ways to better manage the situations in your life.

So- I dont know about yall, but when I think of coping, I always imagine it as having a kind of negative connotation- like, when you cope with something you are just trying to get through it with the least amount of damage to yourself or others possible (be it physical, mental, emotional, etc). But actually, coping is supposed to be a positive thing. if you look at any number of definitions of the word coping, you are going to find that there is a main idea, or word, in common- and that word is "success" or "successfully" meaning you will overcome the problem you are facing. In class we talked about another definition which is "wise coping is not just about tolerating, but about actively and proactively creating clear and firm boundaries to the situation you are in."

There are lots of different coping mechanisms that you can use to handle these stressful situations as well- some of which you can talk to a professional and find, others you can find on the internet. A few I found from just a google search are: Meditation and relaxation techniques, Having time to yourself, Physical activity or exercise, Reading, Spending time with friends, Finding humor, Spending time on your hobbies, Spirituality, and many many more, Something my professor mentioned that really made me stop to re-evaluate how i cope was "coping is not just taking in the entire situation all at once and dealing with it. Coping is taking preemptive measures before you ever find yourself in the situation, and make tiny changes every day to your thoughts/actions/emotional responses/etc. so that you are prepared for when the situation arises and coping no longer becomes an added on stress, but you can now adjust well to your situation.

I think there is a lot of truth to this phrase, and it relates really well to coping- you need to know how you want the outcome to be, but you need to be prepared with a lot of different techniques to handle the situation. For example I am currently going through an emotional time in my life where I am learning to be on my own- truly becoming an adult, and some people in my life that I thought I could rely on and really care about, turn out not to be that reliable and not particularly care for my well being- and it hurt. But on the flip side i do have a select few people in my life and my family who want me to achieve my goals and be happy. But what do i do when those good people aren't here with me? I go out and try to find different ways to cope with my emotional struggles. Currently I am doing so by engaging in hobbies that I truly enjoy like going out for walks and reading books, and exercise in general- and it helps. it is not an over night transformation for my emotions but it does help.

And you can apply any coping mechanism in your life to any situation you have going on, and I promise- if you give it an honest effort, you will be rewarded with confidence and happiness. I hope this helps yall on your journey, becuase I know for me, it brings me one step closer to finding summer in my life.